new7 / Completing and posting my 100+ drafts

89/100
Present day

New7? Was this a typo? I am in my 89th draft, and boy, what a joy to post and finish each draft. This is a victory, a personal accomplishment I cannot deny.

I have the option to erase everything. It's easier. Yet there's something significant about finishing what I have started decades ago. I don't know. Maybe I am just being overly emotional with each passing time. And leaving behind an unfinished creation doesn't sit well with me at this time of my life.

This plan to finish my 100+ drafts is like healing, keeping the promises, and making things happen for myself. A sign that I can still do something better -as a midlifer, as a non-income-generating being. That somehow, if I change a thing or two in my plane, something's gonna move, shift, and there's also shifting in my essence. What is important for me as I get older? What can I do as time passes by? What am I missing? What should I do?

I am grateful that, in the absence of an income or a 9-5 job, I can garden. I can create. I am learning. Yet still in search of an important aspect of me. But what is there to find? Can just being a BEING suffice?

It's almost 22h30; you have to excuse my existential angst.

April 29,2011

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